Happy Valentine's Day

Below is a re-post plus an addition for this year.

A Valentines Day Review
*some names have been changed to protect the innocent

1982: I made a Valentime for my mom out of tissue paper hearts and it was so pretty. Also, when I came downstairs for breakfast, there was chocolate and a Valentimes card for me on the kitchen table.

1990: I had a Valentine's Day party in the basement. Adam DJ'ed. It was really fun even though Peter Blumberg came. He came up to me in school and he was like "I think there was an oversight because I was not invited to your party." Mom and Dad said I had to invite him even though he is a total dork. It wasn't that bad though. We played Spin the Bottle. No one really did anything though. Like no one french kissed. I kind of have a crush on Jeremy but Jen likes him too. Seth asked me out in Social Studies last week. He passed me a note and it said "Will you go out with me?" and I waited but only for like five minutes and I wrote him back and I was like "Sorry, no." How come no one I like likes me??????? I will NEVER have a boyfriend:(

1995: Andrew sent me a Valentine. It was hand made, out of construction paper and I think a doily or something. It was super cute. But I don't know if I like him anymore. I took the Valentine to the Dunkin Donuts on Thayer Street to show Wendy and Jessica. We always go there and order half coffee/half hot chocolate. Anyway, he wrote me this long letter, and he said he misses me and stuff. I might break up with him when I see him during spring break, the whole thing kind of freaked me out. Mom thinks I am going to fail my driver's ed test because I am really bad at parking. I keep on telling her she is being really mean and picky about my driving but I really might fail. I can park in a regular parking spot or the driveway but parking against a sidewalk is super hard.

1998: This guy I met at a party asked me to go ice skating for Valentine's Day. I don't really even remember what he looks like. He got my number from this guy in his fraternity who is dating Jennie B. who is in my sorority, who after the fact was like "I hope its ok that I gave out your number." That is so Jennie B. What does that mean, a first date on Valentine's Day? On my machine, he was like "I wanted to see if you wanted to hang out on Friday night." Hang out. So not "go out." Which means this is not a date? And also does he not know Friday is Valentine's Day? How can he not know that?? It sounds like a date. But even when I called him back, he was all casual about it. What the hell!? I am just going to act like its a date. I will bring money just in case, obviously, but he better pay for my ice skate rentals.

1999: For Valentine's Day, I gave Dave this super-cute framed photo of us from my sorority semi-formal. He gave me a bobby pin with this rhinestone encrusted beetle on it. Seriously? Does he even know me? I think his mom picked it out, I really do. I am so pissed. I should break up with him. Not because of the stupid bobby pin, but just in general. He doesn't even understand me, at all. Seriously I don't know why I am with him. I don't even wear bobby pins!!! Ever!!!

2001: James took me to Jimmy V's, this fancy place in Raleigh for Valentine's Day. I ordered the roast chicken. I didn't want to eat anything too heavy because my first marathon is in THREE DAYS. THREE DAYS!? Oh MY GOD. It is really truly almost here. I am going to run A WHOLE FREAKING MARATHON. I feel like I have been training for this forever and now it is finally about to happen. Holy shit. Seriously, though, I would have gotten dessert but James wasn't ordering any (I am actually pretty sure he has some major stomach issues) and I thought it would be weird if I got the dessert and he didn't. The flourless chocolate torte sounded so good.

2003: Valentines Day is the worst holiday in the whole world. Me and Natalie went out and this adorable guy was hitting on her the whole night and no guys talked to me at all. I only had a tangerine and a veggie burger for dinner and then I drank too much and I got sick at the Orange County Social Club and also on the way home in Suzie's car. I want to die I am so hung over.

2004: OMG. Chris announced like in front of the whole Tarwheels group ride basically that we are dating. I wanted to DIE. I didn't even think we were dating at this point because I told him about this blind date I had coming up (with the Jewish doctor guy Kim is setting me up with) and how I wanted to be open to it, because this guy is about my age, and he has a job, and all this stuff, and Chris was super sad but I was like whatever its for the best, and then we got in this huge ginormous fight and afterward I was really upset because he was really upset and then I was up late crying and I was freaking out about the blind date because my eyes were going to be all puffy and I was going to look gross and I talked to Dad on the phone and he was like "I don't care what you do, leave work early and take a nap if you have to, but if you don't go out with this Jewish doctor, I will fly down and go out with him for you, so make it happen." Anyways, I went out with him (my eyes ended up looking normal) and he obviously liked me because he took me to the Carolina-Duke game for our next date, (which he was supposed to take his brother to, but he gave me the ticket instead). I was totally flattered, but then it was weird because we lost big time, and he was acting really psycho about it, and then I never heard from him again. But its not like I want to get back together with Chris, except then he showed up for the ride and he gave me this fancy chocolate bar and a card and a huge hug in front of everyone and I just wanted to die. So now the whole world thinks we are dating and I don't want to be dating him!!!! But I don't have the energy to break up with him AGAIN. Christ. Why is my life so exhausting??

2005: Dad got me the Pella rollscreen door I have had my eye on for Valentine's Day because he said sending flowers on Valentine's Day is such a waste of money. This door is amazing. All you do is push a button and its a screen door. Then push a button and its a storm door. Amazing.

2008: I went to this Anti-Valentine's Day party at Conor O'Neill's and I met THE BEST GUY. I told him I had just moved here and I didn't know hardly anyone but that I would soon (probably) and I liked to set people up and so I needed to know his type. He said his type was smart, kind, funny, loves the outdoors and beautiful. He also said he was 31 and a software developer and that he has his own business. I was like, "I know a girl for you... me!" And then we hung out the whole night. I seriously cannot wait another minute for him to call me. This is killing me.

2009: I got my nails done just in case Dan was planning to propose to me on Valentine's Day. He texted me January 25th and asked my ring size so it was not out of the question. Anyways, still no ring. What is he waiting for???

2012: Dan's and my baby was due like a thousand years ago (eleven days ago to be exact). What is it waiting for???

It's Official...

I'm definitely bored. I didn't think the boredom would set in as quickly as it has, but it has. And don't anyone tell me "Enjoy it, this will be the last time!" Also, please don't suggest I take a nap. And while we're on the topic, any comments re: Any day now, you're ready to pop, are you so excited, you must be so excited, are you ready, when is your actual due date... (yes, yes, sort of, uh huh, I guess so, Friday), enough already. Well, let me clarify. If you are my friend or family member (e.g. someone that actually knows me) we can discuss these things or most anything you want, and probably stuff I want but you think is TMI, for that matter.

If I don't know you, just please keep your comments to yourself. A nice smile will suffice. The best thing that happened to me this week was when I was at the gym and this lady smiled at me in the mirror. As she opened her mouth I was gripped by dread of what was sure to be a repeat of the same conversation I've had with every well-meaning lady my mom's age at the gym over the last 3 months, "When are you due!? Is this your first? You must be so excited!" but all she said was, "I love your necklace!" It really is a great necklace...

Speaking of the gym. Overall I think my gym is pretty un-friendly, minus the front desk people, who are awesome. But the other patrons? Not so much. I find them cliquey. But you know when they get chatty? You guessed it. When you are preggo. This one lady pretended like she wanted to talk to me about my pregnancy, but really she wanted to talk about her daughter-in-law's pregnancy. While I was trying to blow dry my hair, put on my makeup, and most importantly attempting leave the locker room. Note, this was before I became bored, sometime last week, when I wasn't afraid to schedule things farther out than 2 days in advance and therefore had plans and places to be.

The following day Ms. Pregnant Daughter in Law was right next to me at the sinks as we were both getting ready. I smiled at her. I'm not saying I wanted to chat, but I thought that after she talked my head off, she deserved at least some acknowledgement, if only as a courtesy. She ignored me. No eye contact, no acknowledgement of said smile, nothing. Huh? Did she not recognize me? Did she have me confused with some other 5 foot tall, really pregnant lady at the gym? No, within minutes, I discovered she was just waiting for the worst possible moment to start talking to me. I must give her credit for her precise sense of timing. She engaged me in conversation (or more accurately, she started talking) just as I was reaching for the hairdryer. She proceeded not to take a hint, and continued to talk to me as donned my coat, zipped my bag, and edged toward the exit, with no sign that she was reading all the cues that indicate to a normal person that you are trying to leave.

Anyway, about the boredom, I know I could re-organize my files, or check the balance of my health savings account or do some other productive, nesty-type thing, but now I really think I am done. I know I said that a few weeks ago, but since then, I have borrowed my friend's amazing shampooing vacuum which I used yesterday to thoroughly clean the basement carpet, which is a light ecru type color. That thing works like a dream! It takes work, but the satisfaction of all the dark spots disappearing is more than worth it. I've also baked; one loaf of zucchini chocolate chip bread (gone), one loaf of plain zucchini bread (to give to a friend who just had a baby), and one loaf of banana bread (probably will be gone soon).

I'd like to go for a long walk or swim at the outdoor pool while I could still get some sun, but I am waiting for the carseat guy. Apparently there is one guy who officially knows anything about correct installation of carseats in our whole town. I thought I'd heard he was the best guy. Turns out he's the only guy. The fire and police departments just refer you to this one guy. Over the phone I asked him his last name, and he said, "Oh, I'm just Bill the Carseat Guy." When we talked yesterday he said he could fit me in to check our carseat sometime in about three weeks. When I explained that my due date is Friday, he made an allowance and said he could do it sometime this afternoon, and he would call me, but he couldn't say when... So I'm just hanging out, waiting. Ps, I thought marriage meant no more waiting around for guys to call. At least I don't have to pretend I'm not.

I've watched a few more episodes of Ruby but to be perfectly honest, the idea of watching tv is always so much better than actually doing it. I am in the middle of "The Marriage Plot" by Jeffrey Eugenides, which I am reading on the Nook, and its ok; the protagonist is likeable but the plot is pretty slow moving. Not bad at all, but not exactly a page turner. Which is funny because the Nook doesn't even have pages... I was skeptical at first but I cannot get over how easy it is to read with one hand. I love it. It's officially Dan's, but that's another thing about marriage, you share everything, which can be bad, but it can also be really good, especially if you're talking about an e-reader.

Last night I thought maybe my boredom was over. I kept waking up with this feeling of excitement and dread, multiplied by a thousand. Imagine the feeling just before the gun goes off at a race, just as you are handed the mic to give a maid of honor toast, and you are sitting down with your boss to ask for a raise, all happening at once. I thought maybe for sure I was about to have this baby. But it was just heartburn.

My trip to the State Capitol

If you go to the State Capitol first of all you should know, its spelled “Capitol” not “Capital.” Last week, I received an email from one of Colorado’s House Representatives requesting that I please come down to the “Capital” to testify on behalf her bill. First I read said bill, which was very difficult, considering I don’t speak legalese. Second, I determined it was something I would support. Third, I googled said Representative to make sure she was not a complete nut, which she did not appear to be. Finally, I looked for directions to the Capital. But then Google kindly asked me if I meant the state Capitol... Um, yeah that’s exactly what I meant, thanks Google. I thought it looked weird, but I was just going by what the Representative’s email said and I took a leap in assuming that since she works there, she would know how it's spelled.

If you’re wondering why this Representative emailed me, it’s because I had expressed my views via email on an entirely unrelated bill, which I won’t get into on my blog, because I’ve never been political on here before, or really in general, so why start now… except to say I don’t support an amendment to a rule that that would require all healthcare workers to receive the flu shot. I have yet to see a strong, peer-reviewed study that proves better patient outcomes in facilities where the majority of healthcare workers are vaccinated or one that proves no link between the flu vaccine and Guillan-Barre Syndrome . I have however read articles in peer reviewed medical journals finding no improvement in patient outcomes in facilities where most healthcare workers were vaccinated.

Anyway, my email led the Representative to believe I might support her bill, which would, as I understand it, require the state to directly inform persons who would be affected by new legislation about said legislation, well in advance of the public hearing.

Side note: The best way to review, or to understand in the first place, depending on your situation, although I won’t say which mine is, what you learned in middle school Social Studies, is to actually go to a hearing. It was everything you could want in a field trip, minus the school bus, eating a room temperature string cheese and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while sipping on a lukewarm Capri Sun in said school bus, and pretending you don’t care that your best friend pretended she never promised to sit next to you on the bus and sat with a popular girl instead. Actually, it was everything you want in a field trip, and nothing you don’t.

Once I got there, I saw big signs that said “Food and drink in cafeteria only.” I wish someone had told me they are crap, which is why I am telling you. The hearing I attended had more water bottles and travel mugs than iPads. Even the vice chair of the meeting was munching on Sun Chips during the meeting, in front of everyone, the kind that come in the dark blue bag, the original flavor, which is my favorite, just FYI.

Also, I wished someone had told me that if you want to blend in, wear black. If you don’t have anything black (I know, that doesn't even make sense), navy blue or gray would also be safe. I guess if you are about 10 days away from your due date, you won’t blend in no matter what you wear, but I definitely would have worn something more muted if I had known. Not that my tan sweater was what you would call a crazy fashion statement (as if such a thing could even be found in the Target maternity section), but it appeared bright among the sea of dark hues in which I was seated.

And speaking of being seated- another thing I wish someone had told me is that you might be sitting for longer than you think if you go to one of these things. This hearing was scheduled to begin at 1:30. But so were two other hearings in this room. The one I came for was, of course, the last of the three. And even though I signed in first, the guy who signed in last got to testify before I did. Apparently the pregnant card was trumped by the farmer who drove all the way to the big city from four hours away card.

So while I was sitting through the other two hearings, I wished someone had mentioned that the thing to have is a laptop or an iPad, but not a regular spiral notebook and a pen. I might as well have brought a (stone) tablet and a rock. I did see another legal pad there, but it was on the lap of the woman who had on a pair of square-toed, chunky heeled, red plaid and black patent leather shoes that I would have absolutely died for ca. 1991; not exactly a style icon.

I was very thankful that prior to the hearing, while sitting in the ante room, a friendly lobbyist started chatting with me and, he assured me I should not be nervous. So in case you go and you don't get to meet someone as gracious as my lobbyist friend, when it’s finally your turn to testify, don’t be nervous! The navy and black clad people are really nice. They know you are just a citizen who took the time to come out and contribute to our state’s law making-process, so they try and make you feel very comfortable and not like you are being interrogated. Also, they don’t know if you are in their district, and I suspect the last thing they would want is to lose your vote because they spoke harshly directly to you.

Do note, during your testimony, you can’t just talk. (This wasn't as hard for me to deal with as you might think, surprisingly). Even if someone asks you a question right to your face, you need to wait until the Chair of the hearing says to you, “Ms. Moore?” If you want to be super polite, after waiting to be directly addressed by the Chair, before speaking, you say, “Mr. Chair…”

So, that's what I learned from all of this. I would really like to attend the public hearing regarding the proposed flu shot rule changes, but I think this is going to be my last field trip for a while.

Nesting

I've been too busy nesting to blog. Sorry, I couldn't help it. I used to think nesting was something people made up as an excuse to spend money at places like Target, T.J. Maxx, and World Market. Not that I blame people for that. I also thought it was a another way of saying "I am running out of time for the all the house projects I procrastinated but now that I'm having a freaking BABY a fire's been lit under my a$$ and I need to get ORGANIZED. Like, yesterday!" Not that I blame people for that, either. But now that I have been nesting with the enthusiasm of a monkey on crack, I am a believer that there is something physiological about nesting.

I am especially pleased with my progress on the room formerly known as "the garage room", heretofore referred to as "the den." It used to be the garage, but someone who lived here before us remodelled so that we have a garage that would fit maybe a motorcycle, but it's ok for skis, bikes, etc, and a room that I once dreamed would be our formal dining room, then fantasized about finally getting all the boxes and miscellaneous crap out of (which I must admit was no small feat), and when that was finally done, I imagined it as our den. If ever there was a time to turn it into a den for once and for all, now was the time.

It was hard to move things around being all big and pregnant, but Dan was willing to help. And by "willing" I mean he was completely uninterested in this project and would never have made time to help me rearrange, except that I am carrying our child and out of concern for myself and the baby he moved the couch around so I could do what I wanted as far as wall art. So actually the pregnant thing really worked for me.

I waited until he was out to get on the ladder to execute the final phase of the project, which I am going to share because its a FANTASTIC budget-friendly way to beautify any wall space, small or large! I wish I could include this in a post called "Awesome DIY decor for under $100" except it wasn't under $100. It almost was, though.




Here's what you need:
-Canvases- You can get these at Michaels. I was overwhelmed by all the choices, as far as sizes, but then the choice was clear when I found that the 16x20" size was just $19.99 for a 5-pack. Yes, seriously! This is amazing!!! The little 8x8's were like 7.99 EACH. So this was a sick deal. I got 2 five packs.

-A staple gun. Have you used one? It's amazing. The next thing I want to try is a chainsaw. And then a gun. I mean like a regular gun. We went to gun safety class this fall but I had to ix-nay the shooting part because of being pregnant and concerns about inhaling gunpowder and stuff, but I haven't forgotten I need to make that part of the class up!

-Some fabric. I tried to go the budget-friendly route and shopped at Jo-Ann's first, but everything there was U-G-L-Y, ugly! Maybe I'm a fabric snob, but seriously, that place is good for a piece of material here or the backing for a quilt there, refill blades for your rotary cutter or whatever, but for good fabric, Boulderites, go to Elefriede's! It will cost you three times as much as Jo-Ann's but the fabric is GORGEOUS and the ladies there are so nice and helpful, including Elefriede herself, whose accent I happen to love.

-A level, a pencil, a hammer, nails, a tape measure, a ladder, and some quiet time when no one will see you getting to the top of the ladder and wigging out like "Get down, you'll hurt yourself and the baby!!!"

Cut the fabric so you have at least 1-3 inches extra on each of your borders. For my 16x20" canvases, 5/8 yard per fabric was more than enough, and I had plenty of extra. Staple it on one side of the back of the canvas. Stretch it across really tight before you staple the opposite side. If you don't, you may see creases in the fabric. You may also like to iron your fabric first, but if you do, do the project right away; folding the fabric overnight = creases anyway. After you've done your first two sides, fold the other sides of the fabric inward like you would fold gift wrap and continue to staple.

Decide how you want to arrange them - for a big project like this, use your scraps to experiment with placement, THEN hang the canvases. This will save time and sanity.

To hang, get out your level, make some straight lines with a pencil, hammer a couple nails about 4-6" apart per canvas, then hang.

The other thing I was working on was the baby's room. My mom said I needed to have a light blocking shade, and considering she's had three kids and I've had zero, I took her advice. It was annoying to have to sew a black piece of fabric to the backside of the adorable fabric I used for the curtain, but I think (hope) it will be worth it. This is how it turned out:



The other thing I worked on was this old dresser I got at a yard sale... I wish I had taken a "before" picture, but imagine a chipped, beat up old thing. I got busy sanding and painting, because next to the new crib it looked especially dismal. Then I got a little neurotic and decided to line the drawers with fabric... I know, you'll never see the bottom of the drawers once they are stuffed full of little onesies, burp cloths, and whatever other baby accoutrements will go in there, but the drive to nest overtook reason.

This is the dresser, all painted nice. On the crib is a quilt I finished a few months ago.

Here are some pics of the drawer liners, which will probably never be seen again. I actually got the cartoon-y looking fabrics (the second and third pics) at Jo-Ann's.



The other thing I worked on was FINALLY hanging some cool art I made/found when I lived in RI and have modified a bit since. This one really is an under $100 DIY project. I highly recommend Providence's east side for great trash, which is where I got these window frames. (ps, so what if I have a thing for trash?) Then I made them pretty. Then a friend and I hung them.

Dan noticed the one in the living room and wondered how exactly it was secured onto the wall. I was content to believe it would stay just because I wanted it to and it had been ok so far. He re-hung it. The other one is in my office, where I hung it with a special nail that Dan seems to trust. Either that, or he hasn't noticed it. Now he will, if he hasn't... because if I'm still awake when he comes home, I'll be like "I blogged!" and then I will hang out so my face is no less than two inches from his face and say "When are you going to read my blog?" and "Why haven't you read my blog yet???" till he reads it. And that's not because I'm pregnant, that's just what I'm like if you're lucky enough to be married to me. Sometimes I get annoyed because he doesn't comment as liberally as he used to. That said, historically, there has been an inverse relationship between how forcefully I pressure him into reading my blog and how likely he is to comment.

The first one, I painted and I liked how it turned out:

The second one, I painted and it turned out horribly (not shown, never to be shown), so I got some cute fabric (at Elefriede's) cut it to the right size, used some special glue, and voila:


The other project, which has been ongoing since summer (and don't say anything about freezer burn because I refuse to hear it!!) has been making food to freeze for when the baby comes. Our freezer is stocked with stuff, including:
Chicken enchiladas
Chicken marsala
Southwest corn soup
Corn chowder
Beef chili
Lasagne
Some fancy orange chicken thigh recipe
Some other fancy orange chicken breast thing with olives
Quiche
Pork green chili
And a lot of other stuff I just can't remember right now.

I'm kind of done cooking for in advance because I'm overall just done. Walking around with 25 extra pounds got old a while ago. So did all the other general annoyances that I guess are par for the course. Yesterday, for example, I got stuck in the car! No, I'm not exaggerating. And don't ask for Dan's version of it. I'm not exaggerating, you should just believe me. What happened was, we took Dan's car to go to our friends house, then once we were there, I agreed to be the designated driver so he could enjoy more wine, but to drive his car, I needed to be able to depress the clutch, which means I had to scoot the seat way up, which I normally hate, but now I hate more because the steering wheel was basically smushing the baby (e.g. me). When we finally got home, I couldn't finesse Dan's finicky door handle and I was STUCK in the car, freaking out, with a steering wheel in my stomach, while Dan did everything but come around and open the door from the outside, until he finally did. I might have screamed a lot until I was released from the prison that was the driver's seat of Dan's car. The neighbors probably think we are getting a divorce now.

This is the last week I am scheduled to work. I just want to get through it and then watch stuff on Netflix and also vacuum the basement, wipe the baseboards, and fill out my tax forms (ok don't want to but have to) and wait for the baby to come.

Speaking of Netflix, I just discovered Ruby. Do you know about Ruby? She is the most endearing 400+ lbs. reality tv personality EVER! I love her! I would totally be friends with her if I had the chance. She is on a quest to lose weight and I am totally rooting for her! Even though I saw her on Dr. Phil recently, so I know she is going to lose a lot of weight, that hasn't ruined the show for me, not at all. I just love watching Ruby conquer her challenge. If Ruby can lose over half her body weight, I am sure I can get through another 3-5 weeks of this little person inhabiting my body.

Pregnancy + winter = challenging

Everyone says February is a great time to have a baby. I'm sure it is. People say the worst time to be really pregnant is summer. Never having had this experience, I will take peoples' word for it. And make no mistake, I am not complaining here. My blog has never been a place where I put out negative energy. I save that for my loved ones. But I would like to point out some facts regarding my experiences with the end of pregnancy in winter. Specifically, a winter in which we've already gotten more snow in December than we had over the our entire winter season last year.

#1) It's really hard to put on boots. Not that I have gotten any awesome new boots, although I really want to, but haven't because I've heard your feet can permanently grow as a side effect of pregnancy, and it would be just my luck, to get the best boots ever, only to have them fit for another few weeks and then never again. Plus all the boots will be on sale after the baby is born. Probably I'm really going be jonesing to go shopping with an infant on my hip, but I guess that's what Zappos.com is for. Anyway, I'm talking about my old boots... my cowboy boots, my Emu's, my snow boots, even my knee high black leather boots with heels, which looked so great but made me feel like I was hit by a train when I woke up the next morning, and are therefore not to be worn again till after the baby comes, if they still fit, that is.... I have a choice of bending or being able to breathe, but not both.

#2) It's really hard to take off boots. This is good and bad. Re: the bad part, see above. The good part is, at parties, when you walk in and see dozens of pairs of shoes in the foyer and realize you are at a no-shoes party, and you really can't blame the host for not wanting snow, salt, and dirt on their floors, but you're like RATS because boots are the whole point of your outfit, not to mention you haven't had a pedicure in six weeks, and you know for a fact that no one wants to be to your subject bare feet, or worse, you wore your really dorky Boulder Tri Club No Bonk socks because you assumed they would be obscured by the boots and they way they are constructed (perfect elasticity, never slip down, just enough cushioning but not too much) makes them the perfect-under-boots-never-to-be-seen-sock, but then you're like un-RATS because, dangit, you're pregnant and you have an excuse a totally legitimate reason to leave the boots on. But you do make sure to wipe your shoes a few extra times on the welcome mat.

#3) It's really hard to walk in the snow. Of course its hard in the first place but when the snow is knee deep, you're carrying 30 extra pounds, and you thought taking the bus was a superior option to driving because of said snow, and then you find you're tripping over yourself trying to navigate the snowbanks that have piled up even higher than knee deep en route the bus stop and then the bus is coming but you know its going to get to the stop before you do, and you wave it down, and attempt to run, just to show the bus driver you're making an effort, even though the last time you tried to run 20 feet on flat, dry, ground minus about ten pounds it nearly killed you, so you do this pathetic jog/walk/shuffle thing and then, by the grace of god, the bus actually waits for you, and you enter the 90 degree bus panting like you just ran a 5k... well that's hard. Is it harder than strolling around on a hot day in flip flops in your third trimester? I wouldn't know. I'm just saying.

Supply list

After finding out we were expecting, the first baby accoutrement we purchased was a treadmill. Now, hear me out. I know little to nothing about babies. But I know this: They like to sleep a lot. And I like to run. And if you're alone with a baby and it's sleeping, which I suspect will be a frequent circumstance, you can't run. Unless you have a treadmill, that is.

So I found what looks like a nice Nordic Track treadmill on Craigslist, and the seller even delivered it. I say "what looks like" because I haven't truly tested it. I ran on it for like 60 seconds before I agreed to buy it and since we've had it, a) The weather has been too nice for me to justify working out in my basement, b) I have not run on it, but instead walked on it because for a variety of reasons, which would sound like complaints if I started to list them, which I won't, I haven't run at all since maybe July, or c) The one time I did walk on it, I experienced this weird abdominal pain that just felt wrong, plus my inner thighs felt like I just did a bunch of lunges, which also just felt wrong, so if I am going to work out in the basement, I opt for the trainer, and even though my thighs hit my belly when I bike, its still a preferable option.

After I got the treadmill, baby shopping came to a sharp standstill, with the exception of the acquisition of some great finds at a neighbor's yard sale. Months went by, and then we took the plunge.

We went to Babies R Us, to register for stuff that we thought we would need, which was intimidating because we hardly knew what any of it was, what any of it did, or how to decide which ones to pick because for every little thing you never even heard of, there are like twenty of them. Like a crib mattress, for example... It never even occurred to me that we would need one of these. But they don't come with the crib. And you can't expect a baby to sleep on a piece of wood. But there's like ten mattress choices. They range in price. Some are softer. Some are firmer. Some are hypoallergenic. Some are organic. Some are natural. It's like trying to pick one of Ben and Jerry's 34 Euphoric flavors (at least there were 34 when I worked there, circa 1996), only there's nothing euphoric about it. Unless you count the baby itself, but to be honest, I've been having nightmares ever since I peed on the stick, so I have yet to experience the euphoria of expecting a baby. Not that I don't want the baby, of course I do, but this will change our lives in a major way, and therefore I have been having a lot of dreams like where you are on the way to a triathlon at 7:55, the race starts at 8, you're nowhere near the venue, and your bike is broken. Anyway, we picked a mattress. Then I went online and saw it got horrible reviews. I have been meaning to get around to deleting it from my registry and picking another one but I have been procrastinating this.

I felt like I was suffocating during the 90 minutes we spent at Babies R Us, except for when I found two maternity shirts that I liked on the sale rack, because I knew what those were, how to use them, and what size to get. I cannot begin to imagine what Dan was feeling, because he didn't even get any cute shirts, and by the second aisle, he was like "How much more of this?"

Anyway, we left the superstore feeling that the buying baby supplies thing was under control... We knew (sort of) what we needed, we asked for it, and whatever no one buys us, we will eventually buy ourselves. Doneskie. Or so we thought. Over the weekend it occurred to me that whoever drops the baby off at daycare will have to pick the baby up too, because that person will have the carseat in their car. This will be very limiting, as far as the schedule of said person, as none of our daycare options are on the way to either of our workplaces. As an alternative, Dan suggested I really learn how to drive his car, which will offer us greater flexibility in this baby pick up/ drop off scenario. That way, if the car seat is in my car, we can switch cars if I would drive his. Which still doesn't change the fact that whoever drops the baby off also picks the baby up. Also note, I do know how to drive his car, I just hate to do it, again for a variety of reasons that would sound like complaints if I listed them, so I won't.

Obviously, the only option was to get a new car, one that both of us would drive, therefore we could keep my car, and get rid of Dan's car, and have two cars that were user friendly to both of us. I said we would need a bigger car, for when we go camping. As it is, its tough to fit both of us and all our stuff in one of our small cars. Dan lit up at the prospect of camping with our baby this summer. Then I realized that I had not only implied that I was game for camping with an infant, but that I had gone so far as to suggest we get a new vehicle for that express purpose. I wanted to backpedal, but I was already dreaming of Bluetooth, Sirius, and in-dash GPS... Dangit!!! I suppose this is what they mean by pregnancy brain.

Then we started to brainstorm where we would come up with the money for this totally unanticipated but necessary, new, bigger car... It started to get stressful. How would this all work? Would I have to go back to work earlier than we'd planned? I didn't even want to spend money on a car! I like spending money on cool stuff, like clothes, pedicures, trips, dinners out, race fees, home decor... But not cars! That's like spending money on medical bills or your electric bill; You have to do it, but its no fun.

And then our friends told us the answer came to us - get a carseat base for each car. Duh! How could we have been so dumb. No car payment needed! Just another carseat base. If having a child gets more complicated than choosing supplies, and I suspect it will, I don't know how I'm going to manage...

Pregnancy Top Six List

If I had known how awesome being pregnant was, I might have done this sooner... I'm not kidding. This is great.

Top Six Awesome things about my pregnancy (and yes I know these lists are typically Top Ten but please see #5) below:

1) I have gotten more comments from strangers on how great I look in the past few weeks than I ever have in my whole entire life. And I'm not including strangers in bars because that doesn't count. I'm talking about the creepy guy at Borders in Chapel Hill in 2003 and the hot tattoo guy from the Denver Public Library, and ok while tatoos are not my thing, let's just say Dan was lucky he met me two days before tattoo guy did. And I don't care that almost all the people who happen to think I look so great right now are women. Doesn't matter. They're strangers and they are saying these lovely things that just make my day. I am an equal opportunity compliment taker, thank you.

2) For once I am not rejecting outfits because my stomach sticks out too much, wondering if my stomach sticks out too much, wearing things that disguise my stomach, or trying to suck my stomach in. My stomach has nowhere to go but out and I don't care!! And the best part is, it's rock hard! My stomach has never been so hard. Ok flat and hard would be awesome but one out of two ain't bad.

3) For the first time in my Boulder life, people are impressed with my athleticism. Because running six marathons and completing two ironmans aren't a big deal around here. But bike ten miles pregnant to volunteer at your triathlon club's duathlon with a baby bump and suddenly you're a lean mean machine. Teach a spin class with a bun in the oven and you're an obsessive athlete. (And ps, pregnant or not, just because you are teaching doesn't mean you are necessarily doing all the things you are telling your class to do). At Zumba tonight, I was practically a celebrity. And I don't care if my fans were middle aged ladies. To reiterate, I'm all about equal opportunity compliment taking.

4) You get to buy new clothes. Actually, you HAVE to buy new clothes. Forced clothes shopping... I couldn't have even made such a wonderful thing up if I tried!!!

5) I am GROWING A HUMAN IN MY BODY.

6) No need to feel guilty re: sleeping in, going to bed early, bailing early on social endeavors, eating whatever looks good, skipping a workout, or yawning at work (see #5).